Before getting engaged, married people told me all about the stress. I’d heard everything from “it was my least favorite season of our relationship” to “let’s just say I’m glad it’s over” to “I just wanted to cry through the rehearsal dinner”. Honestly, I’m not sure what the extenuating circumstances were, but I am very thankful to have not had any of those feelings (…yet?). That being said, there are quite a few things that I wish I would have known and that list is continually growing as we get closer to the wedding. If you are planning on having a wedding of your own in the future, take a look at these and maybe you can learn from my lack of knowledge prior to wedding planning:
- Consider pinning a few ideas to a secret “future” board on pinterest. Other than looking at a few things here and there with friends, I really didn’t plan or look at anything wedding related until the day after we got engaged. Although I knew that I wanted to marry Kevin, I felt a little hesitant about looking at wedding things because I thought it could have made me less patient and caused him to feel more rushed. On the other hand, it might have helped me make more efficient decisions. I think a happy medium would have been to pin a *few* realistic things so that I could remember them when the planning started. PS. the word realistic is key.
- Make an email address completely for wedding stuff. I’m telling you that this would have been really nice to have separate folders for different parts of the planning process. Also, can you say JUNK MAIL!
- You’re going to offend, upset, or disagree with someone during the process. I totally and naively expected everyone to be totally on the same page with everything. I thought people would understand that we can’t invite everyone because, frankly, you have to stop inviting somewhere. Whether it’s a number limit, dollar limit, or time limit since you’ve last seen the person, you have to draw the line. There is definitely a fine line between pleasing the people at your event but also realizing that it’s your day. Be firm, but kind.
- Being indecisive is just as bad as having too many opinions. I went into the florist appointment with very few ideas of what I wanted and it was a terrible idea. I originally thought that being flexible would be helpful but with so many options, it was really just frustrating. After an hour of being there we ended up leaving empty-handed.
- If you’re worried about weather, don’t plan an outside wedding. It’s that simple.
- Don’t be afraid to do things differently. Kevin and I are pretty laid back people and want to do a first look, so we are. I also wanted to carry a puppy down the aisle instead of a bouquet, but that got nixed pretty quickly…turns out our venue only allows service animals. (womp womp)
- If people offer to help, LET THEM. I cannot stress this enough. There is always something else that needs to be done.
- Splurge where it counts. Splurging on something that you will have forever (ie. pictures) is much more important to me than centerpieces or save the date cards. Also, you can save money by looking for online coupon codes and going with vendors who collaborate with other vendors to get discounts. For example, many reception venues will suggest cake vendors, and if you use them, you would get a discount.
- People will ask you the same questions over and over again – the proposal, the date, the venue(s), where you’ll live. If you’re not comfortable with sharing all the details, having something to say planned out. The questions “how is wedding planning going?” and “how are you?” are synonymous.
- DIY isn’t the only way to go. Obviously, I love a good DIY project but I was tired to seeing the same things over and over again (thanks to pinterest) and I wanted the least work as possible! Don’t feel like you have to make everything! There are plenty of websites where people are selling things that they have already lightly used ( ruffled blog | wedding bee | ebay | wedding recycle ).
- Bridal shows and expos are the epitome of scams but they are fun and you get free things.
- Marriage is more important than a wedding. I guess this can be filed under the things that I already knew, but through the wedding planning process it has been so evident how well we work together and how important it is to know what the other person needs.
Only 45 days until the Big Day!
Do you have any tips or suggestions for me to add? I’d sure love to hear them!